Love To Love

I guess sometimes people wonder why I like to spend most of my time at home and with my significant other rather than being out socialising and ‘seeing the world’, the fact is so called friends are overrated. I’m not talking about my close friends, the ones I consider to be family like Bob, Christy and Matthew but the ones that really grind on me with their self-righteous view of the world and all that it has to supposedly offer.

I was thinking about this the other day and how I may appear to these ‘friends’, in their eyes I imagine them to see me as a thirty something still trying to hold on to the remains of their twenty something years with no hopes or prospects ahead of me apart from the lifelong trawl of getting married, having children and ending up unhappily married. Well, sorry to disappoint you but sometimes people actually do find their happily ever after because they bloody deserve it and people shouldn’t be so fucking bitter about others happiness because they never found someone willing enough to put up with their vile personality and love them for it.

There. I know it’s probably not the nicest thing to have come out with but unfortunately after years of being used, ground down and quietly nodding and smiling in agreement to absolute and utter bullshit that emanates from these people there’s only so much that you can take without wanting to vent it somewhere. I’m not two faced by any means, quite frankly if I was confronted I would gladly admit my feelings, I’m not the person I used to be, I’ve started cutting all the shit from my life.

I don’t think there’s any point keeping poison in your life when you reach a certain age, all the bitching and whinging gets left behind like it should have done in the school yard, there is absolutely no reason to hold on to people that only make you feel depressed and pretty pained to be around sometimes. The only people I want in my life are the ones that make me happy and that’s Dan and my family.

Since I was about fifteen I’ve been in serious relationships, by no means have I been jumping from one to the next with rose tinted glasses under the pretence that everyone is going to be ‘the one’, in fact every relationship I’ve had has been incredibly difficult but I’ve learned so much from each of these people I have absolutely no regrets. I love being in relationships, I was born to be someone’s significant other and lover, I have romance and love coming from every pore in my body and nothing makes me feel so good as when I’m in my other half’s arms.

Relationship mastery is something left only to the patient and caring, it’s a very dedicated art and takes a lot of perseverance, I can understand why some people are so bad at it and just give up and adhere to the fact that ‘It’s better to be alone’. I think these people are really missing out on how much you get from a commitment as solid as this, you have your best friend and lover at the same time, someone who understands you, doesn’t take you for granted and is always there when you open your eyes in the morning.

Instead of socialising (sorry what’s that? Oh you meant drinking into oblivion – “socialising”), I spent my days going on dates and trips everywhere, filling my life with memories and events (even though some of these men weren’t really worth the time to be honest). At the end of the day, I shook off the friends that didn’t matter and the friends that did persevered and are still here to this day supporting me and loving me for all my odd quirks.

Long story short, I love being in love, it is one of the reasons for my existence, I love being with someone and I’m happy to report that I’ve finally found the one that is going to keep me tied down right until the very end. His name is Daniel and he is my soulmate and this is my life.

I am truly happy.