I admit that I will have the odd day when I cant be bothered but doesn't everyone? One of those 'I need a shower but I'll do it when I get back home from work.' But even so I will get in to work and spend the rest of the day being paranoid and wishing that I'd made the effort in this first place, one because its embarrassing and two because no one likes a 'smelly' person that looks like they've just fallen out of bed.
The people that I am referring to in the first place are what I like to call 'troglodytes', I'm sorry to sound harsh but you'll probably agree with me when I explain the type, you might even recognise some of the same characteristics from the people in your own home town because believe me, they are absolutely everywhere.
They usually dress in the same manner; the woman go as follows: their hair is usually long and greasy maybe even greying and always scraped back in a high ponytail, sometimes donning a hat. Their mouth is full of half rotten teeth and their skin pock marked with spots and no make up. The attire consists of jeans which must have been tight for the past few decades or sometimes a pleated skirt with no tights but socks and dilapidated trainers. Usually found pulling along a shopper bag or some sort of animal themed bag to match their animal, dog or cat, themed fleece. The men usually like to sport a nice beanie hat not correctly pulled down onto their head so that it resembles an unrolled condom; they don't usually shave or if they do they instead you can find wisps of light hair under their chins. They like to sport t shirts usually given away with different things, like on cereal boxes or if you buy so many beers, the type of t shirts that people give to charity shops and no one ever buy so some poor child in India ends up advertising Guinness.
And let's not forget that these people, always always, smell.
It's hard to place what it actually resembles, but I would say that the closest I can get is a cheese from about 1986. It's basically just sweat on top of sweat on top of sweat. The clothes are never washed so even if they do have a bath they would just come out and get in to the same dirty clothes. It's a vicious cycle of filth.
I sometimes wonder what these people's homes are like. Are their bathrooms covered in cobwebs and cleaning products since before the millennium? Do they have overflowing washing baskets of crusty socks and underwear? Have their washing machines ever been used or do they even have one at all? You must believe me when I say that I do realise some people aren't well off enough to have the means to do their own home washing and need to visit the launderette's, but even so isn't this easier, having someone else sort it out while you disappear off round town?
I can think of nothing more lovely and satisfying that having a nice long soak in the bath, using all my lovely smelling products and then getting into some nice freshly laundered clean clothes. You feel like a million dollars! Why wouldn't anyone want to feel like that? At what point did these people stop looking in the mirror or realising that they absolutely reek! Do they get up in the morning, throw on the same old things and decide on a day of sloth and waste walking around town stinking out shops and spending money they probably don't even have.
I've been working retail for fifteen years and these people are still rife, its a terrible thing but when I was working at Musiczone I didn't used to stand for it, I would walk around with a can of spray following said people and commenting 'get a bath,' or 'what a stink', I feel bad about it now, who knows what situation they were in back then but doesn't someone need to say it? Maybe those people went home that night and thought 'actually, she's right.'
Unless you have some sort of medical disorder there is no excuse for smelling, not a single one. You can be as poor as anything but I'm sure someone would be gracious enough to give you a bar of soap or give you a hand washing your things.
I guess now you know, I'm not a fan of foul odors.
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